Why Men Need to be in Discipling Groups – Part 5

Five in 10 men will have a major problem with pornography.

This is one of the biggest problems in American churches today.  Never in the history of the church in America has there been such a secret sin.  Charles Swindoll calls it “the no. 1 secret problem in the church.”  Recently I heard a Clinical Psychologists state that three-quarters of the men he councils regarding porn addiction can accurately and effectively explain the plan of salvation.  Men who consider themselves Biblical Christians has allowed themselves to get captured in this addiction.  It is very possible you know someone who is and possibly someone you would never suspect.

With the on-set of the internet age pornography can be easily access in the privacy of the home: never having to venture into the local strip clubs or porn theaters or even into the local convenience store to purchase magazines.  Without realizing it we regularly give our sons and daughters their own personal pornographic magazine wrapped up in what we call a Smartphone.

However, we treat men with this problem like the plague.  It’s easier for a man to admit he is having an affair, going through a divorce, being a drug addict, or being an alcoholic than admitting he has a problem with pornography.  Men with this problem need to feel they can freely talk about this issue and seek help within their men groups.

God knew from the very beginning inappropriate sex would be a problem with us.  When He gave Moses the Ten Commandments in Exodus 20 God told us “You shall not commit adultery” (Ex 20:14).  Jesus took this even further when He said in Matthew 5:28, But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”

So men, even when we look at another woman with lustful thoughts we have committed adultery.  Jesus said that “Out of the heart comes evil thoughts … adultery, sexual immorality…. These are what defile a person” (Matt 15:19-20).  But there is hope.  Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 10:13, “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man.  God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it”. There is always an escape.  All we have to do is look for it when we feel the temptation of having lustful thoughts or to view pornography.  This could be calling friend, picking up the Bible and read, praying, or just being busy with activities.  Idleness is the biggest cause for us to fall into sin.

Paul and his fellow missionaries set an example of diligence for the church.  “You yourselves know how you ought to follow our example.  We were not idle when we were with you. . . . On the contrary, we worked night and day, laboring and toiling so that we would not be a burden to any of you” (2 Thessalonians 3:7-8).  Idleness was not a part of Paul’s lifestyle, and we can’t afford to countenance it in our lives, either.

Yes, “idle hands are the devil’s workshop.”  The Lord knew that He needed to be about His Father’s business (Luke 2:49), and so should we.  Jesus told us to pray for “workers” to be sent into the harvest field, not idlers (Luke 10:2).  There is work to be done for the Kingdom, and we must not be distracted by the things of the world.  Though Paul was speaking of people not working when he wrote (2 Thessalonians 3:7-8), this it is also true from the viewpoint that if we are idle it is a time that Satan will entice us into sin.  So a great escape from the temptation of lust – the desire to view pornography – is to be busy, hopefully in the Lord’s work.

There are also several accountability programs available for men.  You can google porn accountability and get a list of these programs such as Covenant Eyes, Safe Eyes, and X3Watch.

But, once again men need to be discipled in living an abundant life in Christ.

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